


Rogue One

by DisasterLesbean



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Dark Buffy, F/F, Sort Of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-24
Updated: 2019-10-24
Packaged: 2021-01-02 02:07:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,035
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21153815
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DisasterLesbean/pseuds/DisasterLesbean
Summary: “Drop it, B. The bad girl routine is mine, doesn’t quite fit you.” Faith eye catches on the corner of the room, it looks off. It swirls like heat rays or something. She didn’t think it's that hot but she feels a trail of sweat drip down her neck.





	Rogue One

Faith knocks her cigarette against the window sill before bringing it back to her lips. The window is open and she is listening to the passing engines of cars. The green-grey blood is drying on her brand new leather pants but she ignores it, just as she ignores the decaying corpses behind her. The rain picks up and the wind carries it into the wrecked apartment. The curtains blow passed her while the glass shards lay unmoving. 

“Faith?” Giles asks, not sure if she’s still there. Of course she is. Where else would she be? His voice is drained, tired, broken, and so very old in this moment. The line is quiet, the static joining the screaming in her head.

“I’m still here.” She knows she sounds like he does, that same worn and war weary voice. She takes another drag, inhaling deep and hoping maybe the smoke will shut her lungs off. If it stops her breathing, stops this day, maybe it’ll end this phone call. It’ll wipe away the words Giles has forced her to hear, the mission she won’t take. She can’t take. She must take. “You gotta be mistaken.” 

“I assure you, we’ve exhausted every possibility.”

“If you’re making this phone call you haven’t exhausted them all. Keep at it.”

“It’s not that simple-”

“It is! She would fight tooth and nail for you, for any of us.”

“She did. She has. When you went dark, she did what she had to. She protected the world and us from you. Now, you have to do the same.” 

Faith jumps up and snubs the cigarette harshly. Web-like cracks split across her screen when she picks her phone up. “It’s not the same!”

“She’s gone rogue, Faith. She put four slayers in the ground. She’s moving to retrieve the amulet of Athena. If she gets it, she’ll be invincible. After that, she can get the trident of Poseidon and as we’ve begun to suspect, rule through it.”

“It makes no sense. Why would she want to rule? That’s not B.”

“The others don’t know yet but Angel is dead.” Faith closes her eyes and holds onto the ledge. He’s dead. He’s the closest thing Faith has to family. Giles doesn’t seem to realize that, his mind too focused on Buffy. “Humans killed him, butchered him really. She was distraught when we found out. After the government's recent attempt to gain more control over the slayers and pushing legalities...it was just too much.”

“B doesn’t snap. She’s solid, the best of us.”

“Even the best fall.”

“She’s not Lucifer.” Faith scowls at Giles’ abandonment of Buffy. She always knew no matter how much she tried, she’d never really get his devotion. He’d never really care about her, not like her cares about Buffy. She honestly thought Buffy couldn’t lose it. Faith didn’t think Buffy could do anything bad enough to make Giles revoke his protection. 

“I’m not saying that. She hasn’t been alright since she died. Her mental state has never really recovered. It got better for a while but it’s never been like it was. Losing Angel was the last straw. She’s lost so much.”

“She has and she’s always stood strong.”

“If I can’t convince you, you’ll have to see with your own eyes. When you face her, you’ll see. She isn’t there anymore. She’s not our Buffy, she’s just a shell running on fear and hate. She wants the world to pay for all her wounds. She thinks that since she’s saved the world so many times and that they continue doing evil, that she can do better for everyone. She believes what she’s doing is right, necessary, that makes her dangerous.”

“I’m not going to kill her.” The thought of killing Buffy fills her mouth with an acrid taste. It’s the taste of death. She’s tasted it before, caused it, she never wants part in it again. Especially not with Buffy. Their rivalry still hangs over them and yeah, sometimes she wants to kick Buffy’s ass. She doesn’t want to kill her. She doesn’t even really want to fight her. It’s more of a passing thought than anything, not a real desire. 

“Then she’ll kill you.” Giles states simply. There’s nothing simple about this. The fact he sounds so devastated hardly gives him any authority. 

“B wouldn’t do that.” 

“She killed slayers she helped train. She tried killing Xander.” 

“I’ll go to Greece but I’m telling you there’s a misunderstanding.”

“I hope she doesn’t kill you before you see it.”

Faith presses the end call and looks at the mess around her. Simpler times. She’d take on a hoard of demons that outnumber her instead of this mission any day. Glass crunches beneath her feet as she leaves the room, leaving her broken phone and wet cigarette as the only signs of her ever being there.

Willow meets her at the airport, already at the wheel. “I didn’t think you drove, Red.”

“We all have to learn sooner or later.” Willow’s expression is tight and closed off.

“We know where we’re going?” Faith’s fingers itch for a smoke but she knows Willow wouldn’t like it. She cracks her fingers instead, trying to fight off the wave of nerves. 

“She’s going after the amulet first, our best shot is to stop her before she’s invulnerable.”

“You don’t believe this right?”

“Of course not. Xander hasn’t woken up at the hospital, so there’s no real way of knowing the truth.” At least she has Willow.

They arrive at the temple and find the amulet quickly. Buffy’s nowhere to be found. “Looks like you guys were wrong.” 

“She might be coming after it later but don’t be mistaken, she’ll be here.” Willow wanders off to set up wards. Faith walks outside, looking for a place to smoke. She stops when she sees a flash of blonde on a rooftop. She thinks about telling the others but she wants a chance to sort this mess out. 

“B, love the eyeshadow. You look like you fell out of a rock video right into my lap.” Faith announces her entrance. 

“Faith, don’t you ever think things through?” Buffy shoots back. She’s leaning against a pillar, watching Faith come in through the only entrance in the room. 

“Rude.”

“I’m just being honest. I am obviously luring you into a trap and yet, you come. You know, you always make fun of Xander for being at my beck and call but we know the truth, don't we?” 

“At least I’m not dressed like Villain Weekly.” 

“That’s because you’re always dressed as a villain, maybe get a new body and you’ll be better off. Sorry, this one’s taken this time.”

“As much as I love the foreplay, B, wanna get down to business?” 

“I thought you’d never ask.” Buffy walks closer, hand resting on a sheathed dagger. She’s definitely sauntering.

“G-man is saying some weird shit about what you’ve been up to. Wanna tell me what that’s all about?” 

“What’d he say, exactly?”

“Angel’s dead and you went off the deep end. You attacked Xander, killed slayers, and you’re trying to rule the world. I miss anything?” Buffy smiles but it doesn’t fit her face, it looks wrong. The corners of the room twist and writhe like a mirage in the desert. 

“Yeah, I also stole a lot of weapons.” 

“I’m pretty sure theft pales in comparison to world domination but good on you for owning up to it.”

“Faith.” Buffy’s voice is low and Faith tenses. Hearing Buffy say her name like that has several red flags going off. “Join me.” 

“Alright, calm down. What are we dealing with? You get cursed by some witches? Tricked by a demon? Impregnated with an alternate universe’s god baby? Give me something, B.”

“I think you already know.” Buffy steps closer, too close. “You understood it, once upon a time. We’re never enough for them. They demand, they take, they kill. All they do is use us and consume us. They keep taking pieces of us. I know you understand. How many people have chipped away at you? Taken a pound of your flesh because they could?”

“B, listen to yourself. This isn't you. I hate to be the moral compass but yours is broke as shit right now. Did you pick up some weird jewelry? Touch a spell-book?”

“Stop! Just stop messing around, stop guessing. This isn’t a game, Faith. They use us, put restrictions on us, then they keep making the same mistakes. We can do better. We can make them do better.” Buffy sounds like she believes the shit she’s spewing, her whole body is in it. Faith’s getting a bad feeling.

“Any time a person makes another do something, you’ve stepped into some bad territory. We aren’t here to control people, to rule them.” 

“We could, you know.” Buffy says lightly. She reaches out and pulls Faith closer, hands settling on her hips. She tries to keep her breathing even when Buffy’s finger trails up and down her stomach. Buffy leans in, whispering temptation into her ear. “We could rule together. We could make sure they stop all this evil, all this killing. We could do so much good together. Who better than us?”

“We aren’t supposed to be rulers, B.”

“Aren’t supposed to be? Destiny practically molded us to be. We’re literally called the chosen two. We’re meant to be.” Faith swallows roughly at Buffy’s words, her touch, her proximity. Faith’s been harboring more than a little love for Buffy since they met, she isn’t sure when Buffy figured that out. These soft seductive words are infinitely more dangerous than any knife could be. 

“Buffy, I don’t know a lot but I definitely know you're not supposed to be a world conqueror. You’ve dedicated your life to slaying them.” 

Buffy lays her hand on Faith’s lower belly and presses, not hard but enough to pin Faith to a nearby wall. “I’ve dedicated my life to saving the world, this is the only way. They can’t be trusted to lead us. I trust you, I believe in you. I want you by my side, Faith. I want you more than I want anyone.” 

“B…” Her voice comes out pleading because goddamnit, she needs Buffy to stop but she’s just said everything Faith’s ever wanted to hear.

“I’m going to come for the amulet, please don’t stand against me. I want you on my side, I need you.”

Buffy kisses the corner of her mouth and leaves the room, it takes Faith several minutes to snap out of it and go back to Willow.

What the fuck was that.

Buffy really believes she’s doing the right thing. How could she be so deluded? It has to be a curse or something. She feels hazy and out of sorts and she makes her way back, the floor looking like a swash of paint. 

Willow, Dawn, and a handful of slayers are waiting for Buffy when she arrives. The courtyard has been cleared and the amulet is hidden, it's the perfect place for an ambush. Buffy and her own team of slayers walk in. Faith’s slayers close ranks, cutting off Buffy’s escape. 

“Where’s the amulet?” Buffy’s voice is odd, it freaks Faith out. All that heat from before is gone, she’s a Capricorn on a mission. Buffy’s voice sounds monotonous, unfeeling. Her eyes are dead and glazed over. She looks like all the demons and vampires Faith has slayed in her days. They look like her own eyes had after Finch and everything. It’s jarring but it doesn’t mean Buffy is too far gone.

“B, you don’t need the amulet.”

“I don’t have time for games. You have my terms, you know I want you. However, I won’t be stopped by you. ” Buffy’s slayers turn and start to fight Faith’s. 

“Drop it, B. The bad girl routine is mine, doesn’t quite fit you.” Faith eye catches on the corner of the room, it looks off. It swirls like heat rays or something. She didn’t think it's that hot but she feels a trail of sweat drip down her neck. 

“Faith!” Willow calls her attention back to the scene before her. Buffy’s slayers are quickly gaining ground.

“Why not? You slid into my life so easily, why can’t I slide into yours just as easy?” The words are more angry and dark than she’s ever heard Buffy, even when they were enemies. 

“We have to do something before they kill all of ours!” Willow calls out before she charges Buffy, her hands alight. 

“Wait!” Faith calls but Buffy is already beating Willow back. They’re brutal hits, slayer strength in full. She hears the impacts as they crack bones and jostle Willow around like a pillow. Faith intervenes, stepping between the two of them. “Stop! You’re beating on your best friend, what are you doing?” 

“I’ll do anything to get the amulet. Willow should understand.” Buffy strikes and Faith deflects. Willow starts chanting and Buffy switches focus, realizing stopping the witch takes priority. Faith blocks her again, protecting Willow. Buffy would never wanna hurt Willow. She’s probably one of the most important people in Buffy’s life. She won’t let Buffy destroy herself by hurting Willow.

Faith starts fighting for real. She meets Buffy blow for blow, not letting the hits slow her down. Still, Buffy has always been the better fighter and she presses closer and closer to Willow. Faith’s getting up from a roundhouse kick that shook her brain when it happens.

A gruesome snap and pop, the plop of a body hitting the ground. Buffy stands over Willow’s body and she doesn’t even look disturbed, her eyes searching for the amulet. Faith feels sick.

Is this how Buffy felt? Watching Faith descend to the dark, watching her kill. Did Buffy have this moment? This startling clarity that she’s lost. The dread that comes with the surety of knowing it's her duty to put down the wayward slayer. 

The part of her agonizing because even still, even when she sees how lost Buffy is, she doesn’t want to hurt her. 

The odd rays surround Faith again, the sweat practically rolling off in buckets.

“Willow!” Dawn calls out, face paled with horror.

“Dawnie, where is the amulet?” Buffy asks, her feet already pointing towards Dawn.

Faith pushes herself to her feet and once again inserts herself between Buffy and someone she loves. She gets it now. She gets how Buffy buried that knife in her gut. She gets why Giles was so certain despite his emotional ruin. Sometimes you can’t save people. Sometimes the best you can do is preserve who they were. Faith knows B would have died to protect Willow. There isn't anything she can do about that now. She can protect Dawn.

“I ain’t gonna let you hurt little D, it would have destroyed you.” Faith tells Buffy with a steel to her voice. She hopes it hides the way her heart is breaking.

“You having fun as the good slayer?”

“Loads, think I got the self-righteous tone down?”

“Cute, you should know good slayers tend to die.”

“Yeah well, that’s not all they do.” She digs into reserves she didn't know she had when her and Buffy connect again. Her desperation to protect Dawn, to save some part of Buffy, fuels her movements. This time she doesn’t waste time dodging, that’s how she wasted enough time to lose Willow. She takes every blow and deals out ruthless counterattacks. She blocks more as Buffy gets overwhelmed by a different fighting style than Faith has ever used.

“What else do they do?” Buffy asks as she waves slayers over to help. Faith is quick to dispatch them but it gets harder, having to fight so many. She notices Buffy’s progress towards Dawn and she pushes harder. She dredges up every last ounce of strength and speed to stop this tragedy. Slayers litter the ground and she’s back on Buffy. 

Buffy knocks her into a few walls but ultimately, Faith gets her opening. Buffy is just a second too slow and Faith manages to hook Buffy’s arm around her back. Faith slams her to the ground and presses down on her, keeping Buffy pinned with her weight.

A searing pain erupts across her back as her vision spots. A knife is in her hand but she doesn’t remember grabbing it. It’s held close to Buffy’s throat, a thin blood trail already starting. 

“Now!” Buffy grunts, an expression finally in place. Fear, unrelenting fear. Something else too, something like Buffy before this hell began. Something genuinely Buffy instead of this drone that’s taken her place.

Faith sees a slayer move towards Dawn and sees the sword arc high. 

“No!” She abandons her hold on Buffy to lunges towards the slayer bearing down on Dawn. Buffy jumps at her, pulling her back. She gives a good on and hears a snap when she breaks Buffy’s nose. She tackles the slayer, landing a punch to her ribs. She hears several snaps and knows she broke quite a few ribs. 

She grapples with the slayer for longer than she should, the slayer is more capable than she thought. 

She punches the slayer hard in the jaw, and then again. She’s going for a third hit when Buffy comes out of nowhere and rips her off the slayer. Buffy looks empty again and something’s wrong. Something isn’t right, it’s like forcing a puzzle piece where it doesn’t fit. She’s fighting Buffy’s hold, trying to escape. 

Faith trips them both and scrambles for her knife. The slayer gets to her feet and stumbles to the sword. She picks it back up and swings it at Dawn with no wasted effort. 

“No!” Faith lunges but Buffy’s holding on too tight. 

It shatters.

The knife clatters to the floor and Faith grabs her head, a pained moan erupting from her throat. Arms wrap around her shoulders and she flinches away. The arms just tug harder, pulling her into a sweaty embrace. 

It’s like glass shards have buried themselves in her head. A thousand tears wreaking havoc. She presses her palms into her eyes and hopes she doesn’t impale her brain. 

She hears garbled words but doesn’t listen, just lets the voice soothe her. It hurts and she’s sweating more than ever. She pulls her hands away and attempts to open her eyes but the sight makes her gag. She’s not in the temple anymore, it’s not day, and everything is different.

Buffy is holding her, arms shaky but sure in their hold.

“What?” She hopes Buffy understands because she doesn’t know what else to ask, can hardly keep her eyes open. Everything is that odd swirling, it’s nauseating. She isn’t sure if she’s strong enough to throw down with Buffy right now.

“It wasn’t real, whatever you were seeing.” Buffy’s voice is soft, softer than Faith has heard it since their horizontal tango. She erases that thought from her mind, she remembers how it turned out after all. Lots of awkward silence and avoidance. Erasing it isn’t so easy with the phantom feeling of Buffy’s hand pressed to her stomach.

“I don’t understand.” Usually Faith would front, or at least place a guess, but her mind hurts too much to do anything but ask for clarification. She hopes Buffy isn’t trying to gaslight her. 

“The demons in Singapore that you killed cast a curse on you, one the rest of their clan took control of. It altered your reality.” Buffy’s careful with her words, pacing them so Faith can keep up. It still hurts, still clashes with the reality she is in. Buffy’s telling her everything was fake but she can’t quite believe it. That couldn’t be fake. “I know how hard it is when something messes up your sense of reality but I promise, this is real.” Buffy presses her lips to Faith’s temple.

“The apartment wasn’t real?”

“It was, it just ended different than you thought.”

“You didn’t go rogue?”

“Of course not!” Buffy sounds offended that Faith would believe it. It didn’t matter how convincing Buffy was during her attempts to sway Faith’s loyalty, she hadn’t believed she was really evil. Faith hadn’t, not until Willow’s neck cracked.

“Willow!” Faith looks up and sees Willow sheepishly wave.

“You called my name a lot near the end, started wondering if you were fighting evil me.” Willow admits with the same tinge of shame whenever she refers to her trip to bad guy town.

“Buffy killed you. I-I need a moment.” Faith puts her head between her knees and takes measured breaths. Buffy keeps rubbing her hand down Faith’s back, calming her. “So Giles didn’t call me?” She asks to get this Buffy to talk. She isn’t sure she believes her but Buffy likes to talk, figures it works so that Faith can sort her brain out. 

“He did. It was just more of a one sided conversation. You kept saying how I couldn’t be bad, how you wouldn’t hurt me. Giles kept reassuring you but it’s like you couldn’t hear him.” Faith looks up and sees the bruised and battered face of Buffy Summers. 

Her fingers are tracing a path before she thinks about how she shouldn’t be touching Buffy like that, especially not in front of all the scoobies. She opens her mouth to apologize but Buffy shakes her head. 

“It’s not your fault, you know.” Xander tells her from where he’s pulling an axe from a demon’s corpse. She didn’t think she’d ever hear those words from Xander.

“Rachel sold you out. The demons were willing to pay a lot to take Buffy out. Rachel told them you were the only one who could probably manage it.” Dawn explains Xander’s words.

“Guess I should be flattered.” Faith grins but it’s a weak gesture. Being betrayed by a slayer hurts, too close to their own history and the reality that wasn’t real. That’s the thing that’s still getting her, what’s real. Even now she isn’t sure. Buffy’s looking at her like she knows. Somehow it’s like Buffy can read her mind, hear her exact fears. 

She remembers Dawn telling Faith about basements and mental hospitals. Buffy probably does understand. 

“You shouldn’t be. I still won.” Buffy’s grin is a little more genuine than Faith’s was, smug as it can be. 

“Because I thought slayer bitch killed Dawnie. Otherwise, you were toast.” 

“You were protecting Willow and Dawn?” Xander blinks owlishly at her. 

“She was.” Buffy sounds proud, her eyes dark but shiny. She’s giving Faith a look she hasn’t ever seen, a look that reminds her of a hotel room in Sweden. 

“I knew I was your favorite.” Dawn pops over and kisses Faith on the cheek. She squeals and defends herself when Buffy starts slapping at her. “I’m sorry to tell you but you’re the second best Summers. She’s willing to kick your ass for me.” Dawn prances away, all the pride of a younger sister.

Faith’s controlling her breathing, trying not to freak out. She doesn’t know where she’s really at. This seems too easy, too happy. It can’t possibly be right. The other reality wasn’t much better. Evil Buffy? Absolute shit. She doesn’t feel like either are right but she also fits into both. It leaves her feeling like she isn’t real. 

“Bet I can prove you wrong.” Buffy challenges Dawn.

“Oh really?” 

“Faith, after the reality splitting headache fades, how do you feel about getting gyros?” Faith’s snarky comment gets caught in her throat at Buffy’s question. She remembers the last time they got gyros and what followed. Sure, they haven’t talked for months as a result but something tells her this time would be different. “See? I’m the favorite again.”

“Uh, you aren’t supposed to use her gay against her. That’s not fair.”

“All’s fair in love and war.” Buffy shoots back at her sister.

“Which one are we?” Faith asks Buffy.

“Why don’t we find out?”

Yeah, it’s different. If she knew all she had to do was get her head put through a blender for a real date with Buffy she would have pissed Rachel off years ago.


End file.
